Ship Wrecked

David Beckham, a sheep, and a dog were survivors of a terrible shipwreck. They found themselves stranded on a desert island. After being there a while, they got into the habit of going to the beach every evening to watch the sun go down. One particular evening, the sky was red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle; a perfect night for romance. As they sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to Beckham. Soon, he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it. The dog got jealous, growling fiercely until Beckham took his arm from around the sheep. After that, the three of them continued to enjoy the sunsets together, but there was no more cuddling. A few weeks passed by, and lo and behold, there was another shipwreck. The only survivor was a beautiful young woman, the most beautiful woman Beckham had ever seen. She was in a pretty bad way when they rescued her, and they slowly nursed her back to health. When the young maiden was well enough, they introduced her to their evening beach ritual. It was another beautiful evening, red sky, cirrus clouds, a warm and gentle breeze; perfect for a night of romance. Pretty soon, Beckham started to get "those feelings" again. He fought them as long as he could, but he finally gave in, cautiously leaned over to the young woman, and whispered in her ear... "Would you mind taking the dog for a walk?".

David Beckham turns up for training, wearing different colored boots - one's black, and the other one's brown. Ferguson stops him and says: Go home and change your boots -I can't, boss, says Beckham, the ones I've got at home are just like the ones I'm wearing.

David Beckham walks up to a Coke machine in a casino, puts in a few coins, and out pops a Coke. He puts some more coins into the machine, and a can of Tango pops out. He keeps putting in coins, and cans keep coming out. A guy walks up behind him and says, "Can I please use the machine?" "Get Lost!" He says. "Can't you see I'm winning?"

Beckham goes to see Andy Cole in hospital when he has an injury. Beckham says to Cole "What have they been doing to you?" Cole says "They gave me a Cortisone Injection" Beckham says "They didn't give me a car when I was here!"

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